To lose femininity, to be without that characteristic of yours which is a stigma, which puts you in to a group and frame. To me it is impossible and stigma I refuse, stigma of weakness. I am first a person not my gender and sex.

It is strange to think that women who do manly jobs which for some reason are majority of jobs, that imitate men to make it in their branch of expertise would mean losing their femininity. Femininity is still something that does not speak up, seduces, does not take over other than sexually and women have to learn how to physically defend themselves since feminine women do not know how to. Or maybe they know but the ban is so strong they are paralyzed and scared that punch on them is lethal. Something that is lost may be visible and a tradition we like to be used to, that is expected to be there, be found and it strikes as odd when it is replaced with something that does not belong there ‘naturally’. Femininity is seen a natural characteristic and women are expected to bring that natural element in them forward appropriately: caring, submissiveness, beauty and fragility, helplessness, posing and being wanted, loved, looking for love forever. When women begin to help themselves they are easily viewed as to rough, outsiders, too active, outspoken which is not good for them and not having time to pay attention to their outer bodies and beautify themselves, not giving attention to their families enough, forgetting to keep themselves smelling good for joy of others.
Women’s naturalness versus beautifying is the paradox, too much or nothing at all? Finding likability as women, that niceness, kindness and gentleness which are virtues, of course, such things in a person are good to have but such unchanging obedient category where women very easily are put in and they put themselves in is not working anymore if it ever has. To be able to choose and have variety is what is good for the whole of society. Societies develop on many levels much quicker and wider when women are applauded for courage to make change happen for them experimenting their limits and limits of all in society because it is other people who have the opposition and hold up the wall for women to climb up, to fight against. Preconceptions hold on tight also in Finland. To try to work in a field which is usually for men only, not because to make a feminist move but out of pure interest for the craft, is in many ways demanding, it is adjusting and feeling the atmosphere. Bias is strong and women are seen as physically and mentally weaker which is interesting, incapable even evidence of otherwise is there and to talk with women, what topics are there that bunch of men could ever find interesting to talk with women.
When gender is not fluid and expectations are build solid thinking how things should be means exactly that, nothing much changes especially when society is very gender bound, when there are jobs specially for women and men. And how slowly things change in that area. What are women capable of and do we have to compare to men since we can do both, things that men do too. “Mechanics of language and gender are performative in the Butler-sense (‘gender is a kind of imitation for which there is no original’)”