I know it must be hard to be honest, to hold on to integrity, backbone and trustworthiness. These days of struggle, war, BS and hardship if only way to make it is by deception I don’t want what you have. I don’t want to have what is made with lying, with cheap promises.
Kuukausi: elokuu 2014
Safety of repetition
Safety of using strategy that has resulted well in the past and the weird outlook such patterns make especially visually annoy me, strike me and over and over again it is a pleasure to break a pattern of dusty security. Not it just annoy but scare me to stay put and not make something new. There is strange binding element and relationship between marginal and the center, coherence there is that new must be objected, resisted, it must have trouble and loathed. Such norm strategy manifests itself in areas that have to play it safe because of big money and high expectations. Because we cannot take any risks to make a change in how we act, that would mean jumping in to the unknown which might hurt. Because we must succeed otherwise we will be laughed at, abandoned as losers. To be laughed at what else is there to be feared? Fear of losing and being left alone are ones that drive the world of people. Most surprising is that the same fears drive the world of art. What is making art other than constant jumping, hopping around, sweating, bathing daily and bouncing as much as you can. Reaching out with hands up to the sky, falling down breaking my ankle, crawling in the dark, making a damn mess. And laughter and the lonely path that one is obviously born to. It will make it so, because need of it and it is made to look like there is something wrong..with. Artist that has flaws, what an artist. Artist now is a business man who hides his flaws and sells his work. He. And she must be he, him, because it is a world of men who sell.
Therefore systems that willingly hide, prevent change, look down on and do not dare to make new because it may scare some of us and them are completely out and lost.
Do they get it? No. Because idea of thinking of being progressive and hip without being so is contemporary blindness.
Men’s fears towards femininity that breathes outside regulated cocooned womanhood. What is a woman?
She left her panties and other underwear on the floor without thinking much who would see them as she does with all her clothes, dropping them off liking to watch them herself as constellations of random and a day; cotton, lace and strings, used, changed, private creatures which a minute ago were pressed against her body and let loose. Memory of a cloth has parts of her form. What is so disgusting about it she does not understand but tries maybe that is what she likes because she has to be pure and clean to be liked. She does not leave her clothes on the floor to stay there for weeks but just for a moment, she is not that disturbed.. It is a moment of absent-mindedness, carelessness and something of herself she likes to examine, her relationship to all. It is that she does not behave like she should behave well-mannered especially when she is alone. There are windows, anybody can see in. She malfunctions and is dislocated in places like arms, in places that are sterile and in perfect order and under control that nothing breathes there, like finding perfection in death. Demand for sterile body is against life’s natural flow, decay and against nature in her, her dirtiness, her will and her femininity that smells. Why are you so horrified but you still want to barge in, invade her and her privacy to watch her wrongness to blame her and accuse her for her being wrong not being like a norm of the civilised. Do you lack something when you do that or is it just power you like over her? Do you notice what you lack? Act of curious and wish to speak about what an abomination she is. What did she do? Fears of men have become fears of women fulfilling stripped and solid perfection to be admired. We are raised to think superiority is sterile environment just as a superior race would be. Shame of what did she do. Shame that is experienced because of her, for her and what she is.
PowerPower
I hope empowerment has not yet become overly used word and worn out phrase because we need it. For me empowerment means finding the best qualities and gifts in me and in people to put in use and let those qualities and people evolve. To empower includes other people around, empowerment is not something that happens in a vacuum nor in capsule of my excellence. It is not to praise only one but many together. To me empowerment is not a secret cult. It does not stay hidden nor embrace hierarchy. Therefore I am a bit reluctant to believe in empowerment within fine contemporary art as it is now. For me doing art has made me find my strength, a language that I could speak. To find out how sexist, bigoted and arrogant art world is was a true shock to me of which I will never recover. My naivety vanished in a blitz second during art school. While I have tried to get over my shock which still exists I have come to know that the hit in the face that I was given was for the best. It was a true educational experience of what it is to be an unknown female artist far away. There has been no illusion whatsoever of what it is like to be all the things I am. Here is one root to my feisty feminism.
Concept of power incarnates itself in an environment of people who wish to be known and recognized. Competition to which I am not willing to take part is made by the system of few resources, institutions and experts whom should be flattered and licked for their excellence. System that cannot be criticized is a dead one. As something made of concrete changes slowly does not take critique seriously nor hear any of it treats artists as buttons and cattle is a strange world of exploitation. And they cannot admit it because art is self-evidently good, does good, brings out good issues, is on the side of the weak, tries to salvage what there is to save. Phrase art is good for you rings oddly in this circle of boneheads. Art is good for you when it brings big money, tourists and fame. In this game artist is a mere statue to show off and push away when not needed. For me art world and doing art are two separate things. My art is in the world hoping world will be world of art where creating is a human right not luxury.
“It doesn’t much matter what line of argument you take as a woman. If you venture into traditional male territory, the abuse comes anyway. It’s not what you say that prompts it—it’s the fact that you are saying it.” http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2014/09/01/troll-slayer utm_source=tny&utm_campaign=generalsocial&utm_medium=twitter&mbid=social_twitter
How many times do clichés live? Usefulness of banalities.
Posing to sell, to empower. Portraying women – as they are, as they should be or as they are wanted to be?
To pose is the thing of the moment as is medium of the photograph. We take a lot of photographs these days. We want to be seen and we have every right to show off, show our faces and bodies, be here and there tell that we are doing this and that and are of some opinion. We are filling a space, a void of something with something and we have to wait and see what becomes of all that material produced. Material for others to see, material which creates an identity in the net. To make something out of it all phenomenons and success stories, awareness or distractions, jokes and rants. Picture is a power element which can be manipulated to tell a story which may be false, hurtful, manipulative, abusive, brainwashing or brighten the day like a puppy. It spreads fast, is simple and quick way to absorb and give information.
Now what comes to picturing women, which is a constant topic, images objectifying people get the most positive and negative feedback. Objectification of females as sexually ready and willing is big business and what comes to rights of women is the very issue of feminists to talk about, and not only feminists. Women who enjoy objectifying themselves defend their work as empowering to women and themselves. It is true body is powerful and sex is a tool. Sexuality as a product and playing with it is the you-cannot-have-it-but-you-can-watch it-game. Which makes me wonder who will be had if not that dream girl in the poster and in the ad? Desire stays creating ideals to become companions and girlfriends. Making us search for a perfect woman. The very problem with objectifying is what kind of reality it makes. We are quite vulnerable to images. We like to believe them, get affected by them, imitate and own them. More so when we see thousands of images daily. Products, ideas of how to live. Images are silent preaching and teaching of way of life. Do we even stop to think what kind of images we see and do we have choice over them how we see them and when we see them? Ads pop out without me wanting to see them on my screen. They are compulsory elements which hardly can be avoided. It is as reality was an object in which I am placed to play with other objects. And I am an object. Where is the freedom in that kind of survival game?
I think they who make entertainment have run out of ideas long ago. Why change a working formula.
Women in the entertainment business say they are in control of their image. Control is an important term what comes to manipulation and selling something. Image competition in entertainment is a compulsory part of the play. Who takes off most, who dares most. If daring is considered taking clothes off, what is the so-called freedom there? Who is in control if pop star does not have much on and she says she is in control as a mantra? Do you believe her? Do we believe her? Freedom here is the money which posing brings. Still it is good that Beyoncé has taken most of her clothes off to empower women and a strong stand for feminism in entertainment industry and is a feminist pop/r&b rolemodel. Maybe the word feminism will lose its unattractive and ugly reputation as difficult men hating ideology. And maybe the public will understand how important feminism has been and continues to be, with respect. Will it bring respect to women?
http://theweek.com/article/index/264932/for-women-on-the-internet-it-doesnt-get-better?utm_source=links&utm_medium=website&utm_campaign=twitter
”And I believe it. Between 4Chan, Men’s Rights Activist groups, the Reddit Red Pill community,pick-up artist (PUA) groups, and anti-PUA groups like the one that Elliot Rodger clung to so dearly, the internet has allowed men to band together more efficiently than ever before to threaten and antagonize women. Every woman with an online presence has a story to share about unwanted contact, sexual harassment, and predatory behavior.”
Define perfection to me.
Defining helps us understand. It is clear, we need to understand to make new future not repeat the old. Definitions may not be all that clear so this is a bit tricky business. The further one goes the more complex issues are tangled with each other. New things appear. Something we did not know about. Definitions require knowledge over, thorough thought, definite information and learning for them to be correct. We need definitions to be correct. We want to be accurate and sure, right? It is beneficiary for all to find out the truth, stick with the truth, plain and honest. We know that we do not know the bottom of things. Often we like to think we know. Too often. To be happy with half-truths is what we like to be, if they make our lives interesting. If we benefit from half-truths we stick with them, some of us. It is wise to be aware of almost limitless possibilities of this world of ours, almost limitless within our limits (and what in the end is ours anyway), we should be able to compare the options and be able to choose what is right. Possibilities of ours, damage we can do and the good we can achieve, what is adequate and enough.
How far can we define, endlessly. (Don’t end up going in circles. End up somewhere you have never been.) How far can and will we reach is to be seen. Some call it progress and development reaching out further and further. Does it stop at some point digging and reaching out for the precious? Do we want to educate ourselves or prove something? Till we are satisfied or till we have reached for the truth. How do we find evidence of truth, if everybody has their own? It is satisfying to be able to be sure and know something for a fact. With what kinds of tools do we define and conclude, make decisions that are far reaching, results that are unknown and what might happen. What do we ultimately do and make is to be seen. Decide our minds, set things right, our right. We use our eyes to make up truths and realities. Can we sit in the dark one day? Would it make us mad? Define darkness.
Asking whether I have scars and other personal issues.
Do you want to see my scars, some of them are visible, visible lines of tissue damage, marks of wounds that can look most anything, disturbing and unusual, broken skin. I have got welding scars, knife scars, angle grinder scar on my thumb, scars I don’t remember where I got them from. Nothing very serious nor large, but they are there, accidents, slips of my hand. I have come to this topic of defining perfection since perfection of some kind defined, calculated, cloned, cut, force-fed and decided is what we seek and look for to find and have, an impossible and a dream. Such as perfect skin and complexion seem to be and are the first things we like to pay attention to, proportions, measurements, comparison. All people have their own ideas of perfection and they wish to find it in other people. Things we see in each others and in ourselves, things we like or find repulsive is a little bit a mystery to me. Maybe we look for symmetry and harmony in appearance. The more mysterious it becomes is when I am under a looking glass myself and there is a flaw in me someone dislikes. What is my perfection if I have any code nor knowledge over infinite truth of human perfection.
One thing are the mistakes you pay attention to so closely. They pop out, jump on your face and say I am not perfect.
Light of everyday occurrence that repeats in the wind
I’m interested in how such a seemingly simple thing we don’t need to pay attention to until it’s malfunctioning is so complex such as blood stream and sun light. When you start to study the matter it blows your mind and opens up a completely new way of seeing.
”Blood, on the other hand, absorbs light of all wavelengths (but less in the red part of the spectrum). However, blue light does not penetrate the skin as well as red light. If a vessel is near the surface of the skin, almost all blue light is absorbed by the vessel, so even though only about 1/4 of the red light is reflected, the ratio of red light reflected to blue light reflected is about 10:1. This vessel appears red.” Nick Anthis on April 17, 2008 http://scienceblogs.com/scientificactivist/2008/04/17/why-are-veins-blue
Human veins are beautiful in their organic formations, wild vegetation meaningful in every move and cell, kind of hypnotic. I like to watch veins that are close to surface of my skin. Closest ones to the surface of skin are so full of blood they bulge outward. Veins make all kinds of thoughts of life and death. Some people think veins are ugly.
My fragile existence, my body and its pass ways for rapid stream of blood, oxygen, food and water. It is strange how blood can be scary. It turns your stomach, makes your heart beat faster. Probably the strongest fluid ever to make associations and bring out emotions. It can be shocking to see blood, probably always is. Has it always been so that we are scared of what is inside of us?