You do not have power
I am nothing. I have nothing. I come from nothing. I know nothing. I was born yesterday. Tomorrow I will be born yesterday. This is something I struggle to understand. I am defined by others. I can’t define myself. I do not understand. I am so young. I am so silent. Wet behind my ears, naked in front of everybody, puzzled. Reason for my existence is this: act childlike, be helpless, speak with soft voice, smile, be kind. Don’t have lots of sex with men, don’t think you can have lots of sex with men, but be willing. Don’t show your pain, don’t talk about your pain. Tell what has happened to you, don’t tell what has happened to you. Don’t wander around, don’t look for knowledge, don’t think you have got talent, don’t think you are special, don’t think you are rational.
What is a proper laughter for women? Hold your hand in front of your mouth? Be timid. Women shouldn’t laugh loudly like hyenas, like monkeys, like donkeys even though they are subhuman. Don’t look untended, don’t look unfinished even though you are unfinished. Don’t lift heavy objects, don’t do dirty work, don’t do men’s work, you are not capable. Don’t wear revealing clothing, but be naked, because you are, we see you.
Don’t be better than men, keep your composure, keep calm, keep the look, keep smiling. Don’t speak up, don’t speak out. Don’t speak against, don’t contradict. Don’t show long face, don’t show discontent, don’t complain, criticize, but not too much, we don’t want to hear it. Don’t swear, don’t act manly, don’t walk manly, don’t sit manly. Don’t get drunk. Don’t be humorless, don’t be uptight, don’t disagree, don’t be a bitch. Don’t think you have power.
pencil on paper, 2020