Anyone ever wondered what kind of an influence one’s sex, origin and looks have in life in general and in the arts?

I claim they have more significance than anyone cares to admit. Vanity industries do pay attention to the surface much more than I and I am shocked when what I wear is paid more attention to than what kind of art I do or my looks tell what I am capable of (with which I like to play with). How much is it in the interests of the arts to keep stereotypes alive or whose interests are in question all in all, because they are not mine? One can wonder and it is truly weird one has to keep up appearance and act upon one’s appearance. I make this assumption, I should act according to my sex, sex and gender are always an issue, and appearance, because such is my strongest asset? What is the appearance of an artist today, a businessman who functions like a machine, is efficient and more importantly is male? Clichés are so much alive, I wonder the speed of progress. (What progress?) Things that instantly come to your mind when you see someone, what do they tell of you?

BTW, any modelling agency hire 45yrs old? That would be a career change, lol. Oh no, I should lose weight.

Hidden and exposed, used, abused, untouched, labelled, stigmatized, brutalized, cut, vandalized, intolerated, unspoken, banned, difficult to look at without feeling something, strange, natural, beautiful, joyful excitement, shame, horrible. So, what to think about this? Of all of the organic pleasure of life, things we have and like to play with. Watching, listening, smelling. Painting the news.

Hidden and exposed, used, abused, untouched, labelled, stigmatised, brutalised, cut, vandalised, in-tolerated, unspoken, banned, difficult to look at without feeling something, strange, natural, beautiful, joyful excitement, shame, horrible. So what to think about this? Of all of the organic pleasure of life, things we have and like to play with. Watching, listening, smelling. Painting the news.

Military portrait

To get inside Veronica, Veronica out of Oxygen. Who would not be complex and conflicted, out of breath? How to be exhausted and not show it. To have a sense of self as a machine and how that machine functions. Try not to be violent, but obedient and eat the penis as it was the best kind of fruit ever hanging in front of you. Look like you have violence as a force of nature, there, unused.

How to be believable as sex worker? Is it so that sex worker is recognisable? A stereotype posing a lure, alluring? Something that cannot be verbalised, a thought which is so demanding and dangerous to be spoken out loud with respect, it would ruin something if done so.
To swallow a load, Black Rose Diamond Veronica is a dominatrix. She works in a dungeon. She is dressed in red PVC. Heels so high and black tide up her thighs. Everything is there when she needs to give a lesson and she must be obeyed for the customer to be humiliated in private.
Angelique Rubensia Urbania has voluptuous figure. Something to squeeze while she bangs you on top. Maybe you can’t breathe under her, so it is a punishment to lie under her body. Her cunt is almost too big and it kind of swallows you up. For a prostitute to swallow usually means something else. Something which is partly humiliating, to swallow a load.

How to express

Fear to express, when do you become afraid to express? What there is to express? When do we know, what should be expressed?

A bruise in a shape of Africa.
Those who do not understand, they may say it out loud and look at you. Things that can’t be told her, are not told her. They are kept from her, totally weird and not at all, but totally something. Silent and distant, untouchable gap, it is a shame, it is a religion.

Men who talk to women as if they were dogs, like dogs, like dogs talk, that they were dogs. What is there to talk to a dog other than they just look as if you know the answer. You don’t want to talk to women like they were equals, because you don’t want an answer. You can’t handle the answer.

She was drunk.