Rules, taxes and laws are there to be avoided. Finance world is a world of its own sucking the most out of the living and leaving the rest to rot. It does not sympathize or regret. It takes care of its own.

The measures are very clear. Only odd thing is that the so-called democratic countries and politicians willingly support this survival of the fittest ideology. Media functioning as the megaphone telling loudly how things are and how afraid we should be.

Gamblers mentality – you are making it. “I ride the wave that’s what I do” Trading business and stuffed animals look the same: Oh, I shot a Rhino, got photographed in front of its dead body with a gun in my hand and cigarette in my mouth. Not hiding my sentiments. Hardcore sport at work and in leisure time. Enjoyment, thrill, ecstasy and orgasmic adrenaline as fuel and flow to be in, live in. Game of little boys.

Good evening. Suck on this. You crazy son of a bitch! I kill you, I kill you, I kill you Whenever there is a change there is a reaction to the change. You name it we got it. It’s a crazy world we live in. electronic trading brings stability, it is a very efficient market place.

Documentary film Floored 2009 (see link) ends at the time of 2008. It was the time of the beginning of recession or should it be said the revealing of the financial decline, it breaking out, around and up. At the end of the film George W. Bush is giving a concerned and empathetic speech about stock market decline. He is with us, with our worries in this “extraordinary state of economy”.  “Some have failed, credit markets have frozen. We are at the brink of serious financial crisis.” It is a beginning of some sort.

Making a lot of money, aggressively and in a possessed way. If demons are not in there, I’ll be damned. It is not just a cattle pit. It is mental. Moneymaking is what they concentrate on doing with their body and mind focused on timing and the right hit. Which is their main goal, reason for working, big bucks, show-off and to perform. Most say they do it every day as a way of life. Macho image is part of that way of living as is smoking cigars and spending money like candy. It surely is a question of personality and values. It is  a highly masculine field and brutality of the business is very clear. Traders do not seem to be sorry about it at all. It is part of the trade to take big risks and win or get hurt. What are they trading? Numbers that go up and down.

They enjoy the game. It is a boy’s dream come true with I fucked with playmate of the month. In the film it is not mentioned what it is they are trading. It does not play a role in their thinking what the businesses are doing as long as they are winning. It is just money. We are money.

Shock is that there is no shock in the end. This is a norm. Recession is a norm.

My sentiments poor thing: you just think in a very predictable way

me to be e, to be what you think in your way is strength. What do you mean, in your way, exactly? or You think is strength exactly, at all, physical or mental, is it a thing of comparison, to know? This or that, either way, what you lack is its depth and the dark where one cannot see, a place which is deep and dark at night.
Me to be a letter, me, to be a. Why should not I have all kinds of feelings about it, the good in destruction, there is humiliation, of course, I will be humiliated. I with lack, me the inferior by this and that, of course, I want you badly to look, how else I am the one to be belittled, take a look. Destroyed by looks is a weird process, if you subject to it. Want me to be a? So, I want you to b b.

Descent into hell. Icon. Second half of 14th century. Collection of State Russian Museum

Divine Harmony, there was a dark hair in between the first pages of the booklet. Lucernarium psalms and stikhirad (verses)
O mild Light, mercy of Peace, praise
troparion (something repeated) short hymn
polyphonic we
drink coffee out of vases,
hang ourselves to trees and ceilings
no time to get gloomy though
Week of the Blindman with clay in his eyes

I think he was telling me the truth on Easter Monday. Nonsense. Couple of lines from a movie Big Bullet written down for fun: My name is Bird. My name is Bird.
Don’t stare at me. Please. My name is Apple. Forget Fiona.
My name is Jeff. Anything else?
My name is Tongues of fire?
Maybe, You want blood on your hands? Why would I want that?

when you have friends like that you do not need enemies ( the middle (what is in between?)) in a system of closed systems acting up ahaha i don’t think I’m up for it. How open can one be and what is acceptable.

keskiluokan konstailemattomuus ja avoimuus: pahimman luokan vitsi ahahahahahah op punishmentsWeird that being colorful is wrong. ahahahahahah i guess it depends on colour. what it? all

Abolishing blind spot, which is the place in the eye one cannot see with. How do you abolish blind spot the metaphor? But it is useful. So don’t. When it could be your whole world, or half of it or it is the most important thing you could have but you fail to see and acknowledge it? Blindness?  Abolishing skin, sex, gender, age, appearance, what things there are to demolish in humans and their behavior? Why must things unwanted be demolished and how? How do you become to value something? How do you find value of your own? To learn to value life in its multitude.

Woman’s work is never done! That’s the way it is.

Banality is the aim and means, the relief of life in life and from it. Mediocrity analyzed to the bits or looking like it is, analyzed. Maybe what we see is a result of deep analyzes leaving the results and effects to our minds outside of it, of the analysis that is the basis of doing, as everything is sharply calculated and executed. Mind is the most important thing only as a creating master mind, but what is the mind of the receiver there for. Mind of the receiver is passive, passer-by, powerless acceptor. Would it be in general, average statistics put in real life, and we are settling to what comes easily, just like that. Statistics can be quite curvy, far from banal, so it is weird the equation of what is actually being made is based on statistics and consultant evaluations.
A person who does the statistics worth while to foresee things affordable to do is like the librarian, quiet grey and boring office mouse (engineer, official) or is he/she the hero, an expert, a specialist, since that person is showing a piece of truth of some kind and giving advisory graph? Contrasts in this picture are amusing and likable, stereotypes. Building stereotypes, unfading. Someone exploring life from the far and making it a diagram, so we all can see what is going on in here, really. It is also interesting how such people called mice are looked at. How their lives are less, because they stay still, sit still, enjoy the still and the noise is far away to be examined. The grey people. People of colour unite. I’m trying to build a house that looks like people.

Nightgown on the floor, 2008, watercolour on paper

How to understand harmony? Is it a discipline, order, rule, how does harmony organize itself or is it organized? Is it balance? Is it good fortune? Luck? Good things happening. There are things opposite to each other, one is the disturbance and the other is the calm. Do we need both to get harmony? Harmonious is a musical term, a melody has harmony, a tune to hum.

We seek harmony from something beyond ourselves. We as human beings are not harmonious beings. Our quality is a constant conflict with ourselves and with each other. In our human relations we desire harmony (i hope) which could be called finding happiness and joy of living.

Doesn’t everybody go through the search and finding inner peace, which can be called peace with God. If one does not believe in God, what does one look for? Has the looking for eternal relief ended in that case, since there is no eternal.

Art is there as mere decoration, but mostly non-existent. Oh what lunacy, I feel like screaming. What is it about visual harmony that appeals to us, or some of us. It is for the most of us. How are we made to believe it is good? Imitating harmonious state of mind, some kind of ease and comfort. Clarity, clear view to lightness. Lightness as white, light, day, sun, morning, growing, flourishing. Is this a bourgeois dream?

Abolishing colour in see-through with plastics. Stylish bump into concrete, grass, steel and glass. Hugeness in the illusion of space, availability and air, door which you cannot see nor find. Where is the handle? (they open when you approach, doors). It is called intelligent design, movement sensitive, observant, probably stylish imitating invisibility and accessibility, meta place. And other thing is our obsession with size, protective surfaces (protection from what?) that glow far, glowing obsession with cheapness, glow shows worth while things, raises attention with taking over space with smile, spaces, minds as spaces to invade and cause massive appetite. What does it smell like? Cleaning substances, explosive mediums to keep it shining. Maybe I’m mistaking the glow. It is the lights in the night after rain that make the divine shine, spots, neon. What would glow of something be without the actual essence, inner-outer body of light, body to shine full of? Effortlessly sliding in beauty, in awe. Breathing in mutual understanding of good. Good that it will be brought to us, good that will become if done as we are asked silently to do, encouraged to be brave and fierce models.

Give me more of that middle-class openness b-shit, I’ll surely explode.