Running down the stairs making heck of a noise of some wild herd running that should be outside making what it makes. Feet hitting the stairs with sneakers, high heels, cowboy boots, rubber boots, sandals, party shoes, furry winter boots showing toes hitting the stairs like injury in their minds, falling down about to happen, deliberately making irritating loudness. Their feet like they were to fall off, dance that makes music of its own. Go crazy, you childish. Making the sound that you do. lose mind. it is a weight of worry
barely keeping balance in a hurry.
That noise, take it: continue the monstrous whirl. I want to be in it on the screaming in body of sound. And scream myself, because I’m unable to move myself. I can be appalled by them and stand by uncontrollable horror of youth. Time accused of ruining youth. What it is to ruin? What is there to spoil. What is to worry and why.
Run faster, the stairs end at some point, and you come to the door, sunlight flickers on wet grass. Go through with this in clean up, after, say abomination and brake, shout it over those sounds of running feet. Audio of some kind of despair. Shoes on the table, love on the table, neighbors, me observing, especially me, living on the table wearing shoes, only shoes. Running in hey after having looked at it with heavy breath.
I understand it experiences inflation the word said many times over and over, the meaning, the dirt and whispers and shame. Especially the shame. It stops being what it is. What word did you mean? Do you know what she did? Can you believe it? What a cunt. She is going to pay for this. I’ll make her pay. Tiny m tasting soft. Gratification many times over of pain caused not to avoid danger of being exposed with taste of mathematics the substance of brilliance and daring, just to say it. Just to say mathematics makes you stand above, just to think my life is mathematics. So real. I bet there are more people like you exhausted. It is a perfect world with perversion in it making the perfection and sitting still thinking about it. What is the payment and what is after? That stairs turned upside down. I’m looking at my hair waving in the air like hey.