”The following day, she was found dead on the roof of the delicatessen, 33 floors below an open window of their apartment, her body having hit the surface so hard that her head left an imprint. Even her death echoed her art.”

Faith of a woman, destiny of hers is to be immortalized as beautiful statuette, a silhouette with dimension of mystery, timelessness, body, hair and skin. Placed not taking place nor position other than what is given to her only in terms of her outer qualities and where she comes from. Who is she and will she know herself? It can be tragic to be a woman especially if one is alone. It is a game we must play.

Define perfection to me.

25 elokuun, 201421 helmikuun, 2018 | Henna Timanttimetsä

Defining helps us understand. It is clear, we need to understand to make new future not repeat the old. Definitions may not be all that clear so this is a bit tricky business. The further one goes the more complex issues are tangled with each other. New things appear. Something we did not know about. Definitions require knowledge over, thorough thought, definite information and learning for them to be correct. We need definitions to be correct. We want to be accurate and sure, right? It is beneficiary for all to find out the truth, stick with the truth, plain and honest. We know that we do not know the bottom of things. Often we like to think we know. Too often. To be happy with half-truths is what we like to be, if they make our lives interesting. If we benefit from half-truths we stick with them, some of us. It is wise to be aware of almost limitless possibilities of this world of ours, almost limitless within our limits (and what in the end is ours anyway), we should be able to compare the options and be able to choose what is right. Possibilities of ours, damage we can do and the good we can achieve, what is adequate and enough.

How far can we define, endlessly. (Don’t end up going in circles. End up somewhere you have never been.) How far can and will we reach is to be seen. Some call it progress and development reaching out further and further. Does it stop at some point digging and reaching out for the precious? Do we want to educate ourselves or prove something? Till we are satisfied or till we have reached for the truth. How do we find evidence of truth, if everybody has their own? It is satisfying to be able to be sure and know something for a fact. With what kinds of tools do we define and conclude, make decisions that are far reaching, results that are unknown and what might happen. What do we ultimately do and make is to be seen. Decide our minds, set things right, our right. We use our eyes to make up truths and realities. Can we sit in the dark one day? Would it make us mad? Define darkness.

Asking whether I have scars and other personal issues.

Do you want to see my scars, some of them are visible, visible lines of tissue damage, marks of wounds that can look most anything, disturbing and unusual, broken skin. I have got welding scars, knife scars, angle grinder scar on my thumb, scars I don’t remember where I got them from. Nothing very serious nor large, but they are there, accidents, slips of my hand. I have come to this topic of defining perfection since perfection of some kind defined, calculated, cloned, cut, force-fed and decided is what we seek and look for to find and have, an impossible and a dream. Such as perfect skin and complexion seem to be and are the first things we like to pay attention to, proportions, measurements, comparison. All people have their own ideas of perfection and they wish to find it in other people. Things we see in each others and in ourselves, things we like or find repulsive is a little bit a mystery to me. Maybe we look for symmetry and harmony in appearance. The more mysterious it becomes is when I am under a looking glass myself and there is a flaw in me someone dislikes. What is my perfection if I have any code nor knowledge over infinite truth of human perfection.

One thing are the mistakes you pay attention to so closely. They pop out, jump on your face and say I am not perfect.

Light of everyday occurrence that repeats in the wind

22 elokuun, 201421 helmikuun, 2018 | Henna Timanttimetsä

I’m interested in how such a seemingly simple thing we don’t need to pay attention to until it’s malfunctioning is so complex such as blood stream and sun light. When you start to study the matter it blows your mind and opens up a completely new way of seeing.

”Blood, on the other hand, absorbs light of all wavelengths (but less in the red part of the spectrum). However, blue light does not penetrate the skin as well as red light. If a vessel is near the surface of the skin, almost all blue light is absorbed by the vessel, so even though only about 1/4 of the red light is reflected, the ratio of red light reflected to blue light reflected is about 10:1. This vessel appears red.” Nick Anthis on April 17, 2008 http://scienceblogs.com/scientificactivist/2008/04/17/why-are-veins-blue

https://www.imt.liu.se/edu/courses/TBMT36/pdf/blue.pdf

Human veins are beautiful in their organic formations, wild vegetation meaningful in every move and cell, kind of hypnotic. I like to watch veins that are close to surface of my skin. Closest ones to the surface of skin are so full of blood they bulge outward. Veins make all kinds of thoughts of life and death. Some people think veins are ugly.

My fragile existence, my body and its pass ways for rapid stream of blood, oxygen, food and water. It is strange how blood can be scary. It turns your stomach, makes your heart beat faster. Probably the strongest fluid ever to make associations and bring out emotions. It can be shocking to see blood, probably always is. Has it always been so that we are scared of what is inside of us?

I still fancy construction sites

19 elokuun, 20143 maaliskuun, 2018 | Henna Timanttimetsä

Moving, expanding, elevating, levitating, exploding

18 elokuun, 20143 maaliskuun, 2018 | Henna Timanttimetsä

Focusing on the presence and purpose of benches in city area. Concerned citizen sitting down and laying back, but still making a move.

17 elokuun, 201421 helmikuun, 2018 | Henna Timanttimetsä

It has been a worldwide trend many years now to remove benches in cities or make them unattractive and uncomfortable for people not to spend too much time on them. Meaning of the particular familiar object culturally and environmentally is interesting. Placed on roadsides, parks, malls, yards and gardens to rest and lay back. To whom this luxury is for? How is this object important other than a stopping place? Mere seeing a bench makes me think about comfort of sitting quietly looking at the surroundings, being still and visible. It is an open situation to sit in public place. Bench is a kind of dream itself and a statement. As we supposedly live a time of making the most out of everything laying back is a slightly negative term which have to be reasoned with, which we cannot afford to allow ourselves. We do it too much or too little. Neither can we afford to let homeless or youth hang around our benches nor any place. They make their marks on them, break them and chase away tax paying citizens and their comfort. True, broken city furniture is sad and is telling me of frustration and lack of meaningful activity.

I look at these brown benches we have in my neighborhood. Yes, not hugely charming or inviting. They do not make me want to spend time sitting on them, but I like to have them to remind me that there is this possibility of sitting down, looking, breathing slowly and observing. Our benches do make me want to disturb the horrid chosen aesthetics of theirs, lack of any aesthetics which could be something else than just practical and cheap. Suburbia benches are less attractive than the ones in the center, less money is spend on them here far away from visitors’ eyes. They are just fine and enough. How to enjoy a city? Sitting and enjoying the environment, spending time doing nothing is not welcomed. Time is wasted. What kind of waste is constructing making? Benches are there to fulfill courtesy and obligation of the city to bring joy to its people.

I want to add not remove. Anything that might please the eye is in the mind, imagined and is culturally bound. I look for it and something else. I see much of beauty, but are we able to make beauty for public places anymore. To please the eye is to please the brain, bring pleasure via seen beauty. It seems we cannot afford beauty, to give beauty to a place or maybe the concept of beauty now is completely something I don’t grasp. It is perhaps redefined or unimportant. Maybe we do not care what we see and make for our cities, because they are not ours. We do not have power over them.

If people are not allowed to sit down and stay in one spot without constantly physically moving what kind of city do we make? And if aesthetics of such small but highly important detail of any city is not regarded and noted for what does it do to our thinking and living not to mention to our bodies? What happens when benches are removed altogether? Will we begin to enjoy our lawns?

We stand together! Don’t forget to stretch. http://www.whatartis.org/aestheticAntiAesthetics.html Aesthetics is a privilege. Doing nothing was a privilege.

My cock, my realness, touch my realness

11 elokuun, 20143 maaliskuun, 2018 | Henna Timanttimetsä

porn-2015029

To become familiar with one’s fears is to face them, everybody knows. To be afraid is to give power over oneself to someone else.

6 elokuun, 201414 helmikuun, 2018 | Henna Timanttimetsä

What kind of things shock you? How do you react to shock? Do I shock you, do I really shock you? I would be glad if I did. It is a defense mechanism to seem unapproachable and I rather like it.
To be attacked is a common fear among women. We have to be prepared for it mentally and know how to hit back. Know where to hit as we are physically weaker than men and it is men who mostly attack, physically. Women attack other ways. They use their knowledge over what hurts most, which is to be left outside. Clicking and grouping against the one who is a threat. It is pretty sad. The most afraid people hang on to other people and their opinion about them. It tells something about women.

State of unawareness of what happens brings us irritating feeling of bottomless prospects, looking into an abyss like death, vanishing and fading me. Well it is what artist has to deal with and more and more in an very unbalanced world everybody else as well do not feel secure financially, emotionally nor socially. It is a world of threats, not only aggression-wise, but finding balance, if that is what one seeks, is harder and harder. We are exploited through our fears, through what we have to lose. What we are afraid to lose. Fear is born out of having something to lose, something precious, to which we hold on to, because it keeps us safe.

Is there a shock over something seen or experienced or are you in constant shock all the time, born scared. Do you think it is possible, because I think it is the most definite and primal emotion guiding our lives. Looking over one’s shoulder, hesitating every decision, every step, not jumping, no. Bodily reactions vary in different kinds of shocking experiences, and it is mostly our bodies reacting to instincts, previous experiences, emotions, thoughts – ready to escape. It is not very rational to be afraid. Ready to be appalled, because public opinion may be such that it forces to join the mass hysteria, panic over whatever. It is so we feel safe in a crowd, with those whom we can think the same, agree with. It is appealing to agree. I disagree. I feel compelled to do the counteract.

I do not disagree because it is fun or appealing just because it is difficult to agree with most people. And I thought I was the most scared person, because it truly is the feeling on top of me. I am not standing on it. I try to beat it by analyzing it. The most feared things, could I become unafraid if I just decided so? Yes.