acrylic on panel, pencil on paper, 2022
Banal and strange at the same time, I suppose it is festive to be able to catch an animal, requires skill which many don’t have since we don’t need to hunt for food, yet. Such survival skills may turn out to be very useful in the future. Tradition of posing in front of game is a proud moment, the bigger the animal the better.
Killer, acrylic on canvas, pencil on paper, 2022
Sounds as chanting this world. Christ is crisis. Chanting in crisis. Chanting an end.
Call it divine, call it repetition of the name, repetition of the sound, call it repetition of the act, the same movement, the same fear and hate in the call,
do not expect the same, expect the worst, do not expect the sane, expect lunacy, expect your narrowest nightmare corridor with mass of people in it with you unable to breathe, with them and their smells unwashed.
Call it hypothetical trust, blind hypothetical trust, insane hypothetical belief, expect the unseen, the unknown purity command, fury, need to make the idea of purity happen in black. See the flag, see the scarfs, see the eyes. Nothing will turn their heads around from this mission. Nothing. Crisis is in the not negotiable, in the smallest space, in the smallest breaths inhaled, in passing out with the rest.
ThreatExpect the crisis, threatExpect the hurt, threatExpect the ill, it will come, it will be a terrorist, call it a terrorist, call it an organizationTerrrrrrrrroriiiiiist, Terrrrrrrrrrrroriiiiist! It will be an explosion, a blast. Call it what you will, call it fear, terror, tyranny, call it many of who were hurt, many of those who are dead. Call it your blind heart, call it the answer of the kind heart.
It is not a comical POW. It is not a comical savage. It is the hidden savage of Christ, the one you deny, the one you do not want to acknowledge, because it is in you, in your religion. Smell of the divine captivated, taken, imprisoned. Moral imperative making monsters, sounds of this world, being a monster in an acceptable way, the same way as chanting righteousness, justice, superiority. Us and them, heaven and threat, Paradise of safety and Hell for the uncovered. Those who did what they had to do. Those who accomplish God’s plan to save what there is for us to be saved, next to nothing. Standing next to nothing, next to a plan of salvation drawn onto ground.
To live is to fear
I’m going to learn to sleep sitting down at stations, wake up when someone approaches, touches, breathes, looks towards me. Sleep in a flight, work in the night under a newspaper. I will not be afraid. I will be a document of strength, of survival. Sleeping and waking up, walking and looking, sleeping under a tree, passersby gaze, maybe fear. Becoming the environment, giving up my comfortable bed, my isolated room, safety, quiet space for only me. Exposing myself to danger, disorder and death, but also harmony, beauty and life. There is a lot to live for, lot to see and experience, but is that to be experienced?
pencil on paper, 2015
You mean minor attracted?
Gouache painting with graffiti of Marilyn and Happy Meal ad.
River of no return
How many takes?
She was very sweet. She was a comedian. She was very shy. She was fuck me. She was very uncomfortable. She was convinced, she was not very sexy and pretty. She didn’t have an aura of sexiness about her. There was some magic about her, she would play at it. She would burlesque it. She seemed like a lost child. It seemed to her like Alice in Wonderland and she could not believe it. Anybody was very serious about her. She really felt she didn’t have the inner qualifications to fulfil the image of a sex goddess. She thought that the whole thing was a lie, because it was not her. She would never feel worthy. She was very very difficult. She was vulnerable. She was weak. She was teary. She was struggling. She was falling apart. She was hurt. She was an addict. She was needy. She was difficult. She was in pain. She was adorable. She was drunk. She was nice. She was childlike. She was late. She was lovely. She was hanging on. She was calling me. She was calling everybody. She was caring. She was unprofessional. She was sexy. She was beautiful. She was funny. She was doing the thing that was wanted of her, she was not doing what she wanted.
Majakollektiivi Timanttimetsä 