To have been deflowered one’s cherry got popped. Perky expressions for a happening which is somewhat a little death for a girl or event of entering adulthood, a death-like experience can be very exhilarating and fun for a while. Someone penetrates you and you will enter as a person something corrupt. You become corrupted, used because you most likely are not the one who has power in this matter. It can be at its worse dishonouring where your virginity and dignity is gone. It is a funny and naive thing to be a virgin so to get rid off it surely is something to hurry but for a young woman and for a girl it can be a dangerous thing of dishonouring and dehumanizing. You are firstly a thing to be used and consequences usually are cruel for women. Men are heroes, women are not in this case. Young women who begin their sexual life very young will very likely be called names like whore, slut, cheap tramp, corrupt no good female who is destined to fail in life. Ever heard been called a bitch, nympho, fallen woman, nasty woman: one does not have to be sexually promiscuous to be called like this. All it takes is to do something which rebels the traditional position women should happily take and like. Be nice and you will be treated nice? False promise of course. When you go with the flow and act as you are expected to you will be abused and discarded when you are no longer useful. To be confident and do what you see best disregarding what people around you push you to do and be like, is what you should be doing.
To deflower means one is a flower before one begins one’s sex life. What one is after the cherry popping can be a matter of opinion. A woman who has lost her most priced asset or one is experienced? One is corrupted, especially female body is. One is learning the ways how to use and not use one’s body. One can be learning how to say no, when to say no, how to demand use of condom and why demand use of condom. One can learn that having sex with a stranger heavily drunk is a very bad idea but surely it can be experienced because it is exciting and thrilling. Or you can end up being fucked by many strangers during one night when you were too intoxicated to do anything to stop them and they had fun while you didn’t know anything about it or maybe you did but they were stronger than you.
Woman is alone in this matter. Shame is hers to bear, caused mainly by her. Shame is within her and she must be aware that she lures men to do things to her. Women are let to believe that men are animals that do what their instincts tell them and wrongdoings can be avoided only when women avoid situations which can lead to harm and use self-censoring that hides and camouflages them to background. Too much femininity is a sign of willingness and easy prey.
So we give quite a power to pure animals who cannot control their urges?
I pay attention to Britney Spears as if it was only Britney that the problem of misogyny would involve but sadly the problem is huge and goes on as an unnoticed light issue unchanged because why bother to change something that clearly works. Female celebrities are the tip of an iceberg, if you allow the worn-out phrase, it still works though, the phrase. It is all women who are under microscope whether they are good mothers, good women, worthy as human beings compared to men who are naturally solidly deserving and able. Celebrity women are asked if they are good mothers, their possible pregnancies are monitored in hawk-like manner like they had somehow committed the sin of having sex, living as anybody else. Her life has had a happy ending because it is the climax, the expectation realising itself, we have watched and pushed her to go exactly that direction. Women marry with men and have babies, reproduce and look happy in doing so. That is why people fuck, oh sorry, make love, and of course stay happily married to another celebrity or someone who maybe uses influence of the spouse to make a career or then they have divorce which give a story to tell and confess what went wrong. What was the wedding like, who was there, how romantic luxury life and depictions of these royals sell tons of magazines, what were they wearing. Images and stories tell, they are all we want to see and hear.
To ask whether a woman is a good mother is something that is almost a compulsory question asked of all celebrity mothers. You like to be asked whether you are a good mother frequently? Like capabilities of successful women were less in this regard still than capabilities of the male ones. Men are never asked bluntly whether they are good fathers which is of course because a man is a good parent, right. Oh yes he is a wonderful father when asked what kind of father he is to his children, and a good husband. And we imagine what is a wonderful father like: he plays with his children, spends time with them, laughs with them and reads a bedtime story.
To be worried about Britney and her health is not an issue, it is like why bother, she is where everybody wants to be and where she wanted to be so she must face all the consequences. It is to report what happens to her nonstop despite the disturbance and repetition in media, despite how media makes her act and sound like. We still think it is her and her mistakes, her shame, her falling with a baby, her fault she must run and hide from the paparazzi. It is us that they feed, we buy it, the stories with good appetite and we eat as much as there is to eat like cannibals. Not to mention what kind of culture and atmosphere all this creates for youngsters to grow into. ”You are single now, why so and what is that like for you?” Circle of questions asked by journalist, by people who call themselves journalists, touch issues like sex, body, looks, pregnancies, wealth, relationships and the art these celebrities make. ”Your new record, it is on the charts, congratulations. What do you think about your new record?”
Live a little, live a lot. How to know when? Live amounts of unknown.
I use lipstick to attract myself.
I use lipstick to notice my lips. To see my mouth in a different way.
Would an ancient Greek be angry with me?